i want bones like iron, blood like mercury.
June 8, 2005 § Leave a comment
i’m sure this wasn’t worth the wait,
or nearly as exciting as we all would have hoped.
i had no camera at the after party.
i did, however, want to tell a story about it.
but that was like…two weeks ago.
since then we saw star wars
at the drive-in on friday night
(yoda is such a tot fiend!),
we went to the beach on saturday, mmm.
i’ve jumped in a pool with all my clothes on,
gotten a roommate of sorts, sort of,
smoked a bowl with kp, emma, and billy druing 7th period,
and bought a hot pair of black gucci sunglasses
(that were also ridiculously expensive).
i’m so busy living.
remember when all i did was bitch and complain?
oh, how times have changed…
we took a walk past the radio tower,
to a bridge in the middle of nowhere,
and i did this in heels and my prom dress,
while carrying a glass of scotch.
chelsey was drunk and i loved it.
laney and nick peer pressured me into doing the wall slide,
but i love them for it.
frances had a sip of my scotch,
if only because she’s down with the business.
we went to the grocery store at 4:00am,
and i bought tons of candy,
only to not eat much of it,
and have plenty left over for
a candy picnic with tyler and chelsey
the next morning.
we watched mousetrap.
there was so much more.
i wrote the following on may 23rd,
and i believe it still applies:
i think i’ve slowed down
to the point where i’m
actually at a standstill.
truth be told, i’m enjoying
every second of it. but
just the same, it’s something
i need to adjust to. this is
different. i suppose this
difference is the reason
i’ve decided to accept and
embrace what i’ve got going
on. i know i’m so far
behind in life right now,
but perhaps it’s for good
reason. and this is the
fun part: waiting it out to
see for real what the
effects and consequences
and blessings this will have
down the road. very rarely
have i ever felt so content
with who i am and where
i am going, or with the
knowledge that i’m not
really going anywhere
at the moment, and that
sometimes it’s okay.
this might be enough
to get by for now.
que sera, sera.
“time is a formality;
love is reality.”
and now back to today, the 8th of june,
all i can say is it’s summer for real.
i need to do this more often.